Reasons Parents Fail to Love Their Kids

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Self-love is crucial for fostering love in relationships. When individuals lack self-acceptance, it hinders their ability to love and care for others,

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Many parents have a negative self-image which they unwittingly extend to their children.

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They find it threatening to bear the responsibility and extensive care that the baby and developing child require and may even come to resent their offspring.

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Parents who are undeveloped or immature experience their children as an unwanted, intimidating dependency load.

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Many people find it difficult or intolerable to accept love—in particular, the simple direct loving expressions of children.

If the parents were hurt in their developmental years, they will have problems accepting love and intimacy from their children.

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Parents have unresolved trauma in their own lives.

Parents with unresolved traumas may struggle to attune to their children's needs, leading to either rejecting or overcompensating behaviors.

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Having children reminds parents that time is passing and tends to increase their death anxiety.

This can cause tension and even resentment in the parent and a self-protective, defensive retreat from feeling that is directly or indirectly hurtful to their children.

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Parents may struggle with accepting their children's differences, viewing them as defiance. Imposing sameness can be damaging,

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Parents tend to use their children as immortality projects, which has a destructive effect on their offspring.

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Needy parents may confuse possessiveness for love, causing children to feel suffocated. This can lead to difficulty with physical touch and feeling trapped in relationships later in life.

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Parents’ unfulfilled primitive hunger for love and care from their childhood causes them, in turn, to focus these strong desires on their children.

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They may become unruly, defiant, disobedient, obnoxious, demanding, hostile, or generally unpleasant. Even though they have been a primary cause of these behaviors,

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Due to inadequate or problematic parenting styles, many children develop traits that are unlikeable or intolerable.

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